Feb 012006
- Girl Scout cookies cost $4 per box. FOUR DOLLARS.
- I have been getting Dwight Yoakum and Toby Keith mixed up for years. Maybe because “Dwight” and “Toby” are the worst possible country music names in history. Seriously, though, I know that at least one of these guys loves America and wants to stick a boot in some terrorist ass, but I can never remember which one.
- Which reminds me of my favorite theory: guys with effeminate or awkward first names seem to succeed more because of the chips on their shoulders. For example, have you noticed how many guys named Bruce are famous? And just listen to this list: Wayne Gretsky, Lynn Swann, Ralph Lauren, Gus Frerotte (heh heh, just kidding there!), Michel Goulet, Wayne Newton, Josey Wales, Ernest Hemingway, Sanford Cohen. If you keep an ear out you’ll notice dozens of examples. It’s especially prevalent in sports, where guys with girly names have gone through their whole lives having to shut up the jerks who made fun of them. See also: “Boy Named Sue.”
- Justice Stephen Breyer must be thrilled to no longer be the junior associate justice. Now the fresh-faced, idealistic Sam Alito is stuck doing the dirty work.
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