One way to get those teen abstinence numbers way up

I’m no “sexpert,” but I am pretty sure that Montgomery County, Maryland’s understanding of the meaning of “abstinence” isn’t entirely accurate.

Karen Sees and Cindy Richards said the ‘‘contraception comparison chart” used in eighth-grade health class at Herbert Hoover Middle School describes three types of abstinence: No intercourse, withdrawal (ejaculation outside of the body) and rhythm (no intercourse during ovulation).

‘‘Since when did the term abstinence change to include the two most ineffective forms of birth control possible?” said Cindy Richards of Potomac. ‘‘Here we have been teaching our kids that abstinence means not having sex, period. What kind of message is this [chart] sending?”

Sees, also of Potomac, first became aware of the chart while helping her son study for health class in late October. She said she immediately e-mailed her son’s health education teacher about her concerns.

‘‘I’m all for teaching sex education, but I want it to be accurate information,” she said. ‘‘I was told by my son’s health teacher that withdrawal and rhythm are considered abstinence because [sexual partners] are refraining from what they want to do.”

I guess, semantically, they are correct–they are teaching various methods of abstaining from things one might like to do. But they should add some other items to the list:

• dieting
• boycotting Target
• reading books without pictures
• eating all of your vegetables

They should consider introducing this theory into drug education as well: Don’t smoke crack–stick with regular cocaine!

This gives me an opportunity to write about one of my college roommates, who believed that “the pull out method” was an effective means of birth control. A few of us sat him down and explained the shortcomings (ha ha ha) of withdrawal, and ultimately convinced him to change his ways. For the record, boys and girls, withdrawal is highly ineffective and does nothing to prevent other negative consequences of intercourse, including sexually transmitted diseases and low self-esteem.