Courtland Milloy, I’m calling you out!

For a perfect example of hyperbole turning a valid and fairly important argument into a straw man, check out Courtland Milloy’s column on the Washington Redskins’ offensive team name. An absurd highlight:

In this classic matchup, the Whiteys have a quarterback who thinks fast on his feet and is very smart when it comes to analyzing the gestalt of the game. Or so the TV commentators say. The Darkies, to their credit, have a quarterback who is strong and, boy, he runs faster than a water bug on crack.

And here come the mascots. For the Whiteys: a giant saltine cracker. For the Darkies: a watermelon rolling on 20-inch rims.

Offensive? Not as long as such newspaper headlines as “Redskins Get Skinned Alive” are upsetting only because the team lost.

Note that the editor responsible for a headline like the one Milloy puts forward as plausible would find himself fired and vilified before the first papers were off the presses. Note also that Milloy, were his argument not stated in such a ridiculous, unfair, and anecdotal way, would be one hundred percent right–the team’s name is an anachronistic slur that demeans a culture by celebrating its denigration, and the name should be changed¹. But as ought to be obvious after the last ten years of partisan bickering, inaccurately exaggerating one’s opponent’s position when you’re right is the worst thing you can do. Make your point clearly and fairly and let reasonable people draw reasonable conclusions².

For more information on this rhetorical error, see Michael Moore’s documentaries, the Green Party, and Bill O’Reilly’s entire career³.

¹ As I’ve already suggested. Go Silverbacks!
² Well, it might work. You never know.
³ I’m just asserting for the sake of argument that Bill O’Reilly has ever had a relevant and valid thought. It’s possible.